Fashion 2013

Psychological deficiencies. What can be considered a disadvantage: form your own opinion. Types into which the main shortcomings of a person can be divided

Human defects are qualities of mental and physical organization that are considered undesirable and can reflect a person’s personal, behavioral and physical manifestations, including his actions and taste. Those. relate to absolutely any sphere of human manifestation, but do not satisfy either the person directly or someone who evaluates the personality. The advantages and disadvantages of a person have a subjective radical as the main one for determination. The impossibility of an unambiguous and static division of qualities into good and bad introduces confusion into the delimitation and classification of human manifestations as shortcomings or advantages. Also, in different situations that introduce different semantic contexts, the same actions have different interpretations as a manifestation of a disadvantage or an advantage (for example, a quick response, without taking into account the smallest details, is a disadvantage in family life, while in a situation of military danger this quality plays a primary role) role and is considered a virtue).

Mention of a flaw implies a context of little or no something, although the same is true of character (lack of patience or honesty).

What are disadvantages

Personality flaws mean vices and weaknesses that take the form of addictions or spinelessness of character; this also includes the manifestation of negative qualities from the category and. A person’s strengths and weaknesses are polar manifestations, one helps to move forward, achieve success, evokes respect, the second destroys a person’s destiny, rebuilds his personality, by making him weak, preventing success, pushing him to unworthy or even illegal actions and is the main reason for disrespectful attitude and avoidance of social interaction.

Disadvantages are usually presented as a characteristic that is a characteristic of a person for a fairly constant and long period of time. Everything that happens situationally and not systematically can be called unworthy behavior, and it is not worth focusing special attention on such isolated manifestations as much as with a constant variant.

There is an opinion that even the shortcomings in a loved one are liked, but, unfortunately, love is not so powerful as to withstand serious personal changes that affect the lives of others. It’s one thing when this feeling allows you to accept some kind of sloppiness, but coming to terms with uncontrollable outbursts against the background of alcohol addiction with subsequent beatings is unlikely to help. Accordingly, expecting that the world will continue to revolve around and accept everything as it is, has neither meaning nor hope, shortcomings need to be corrected, replacing them with worthy behavior and manifestation, learning new life strategies, otherwise self-indulgence will lead to complete personal degradation and destruction of life.

From a similar concept of acceptance, some preachers of humility try themselves and advise others not to get rid of shortcomings, but to accept them. And the idea itself is very wonderful, it is about accepting and valuing one’s self, but it is impossible to show self-love while leaving destructive behavior active. Any type of addiction is latent, any resentment takes up space and mental energy where love could be located, time spent on quarrels cannot be returned to create. Any manifestation requires resources of time and energy, which means that by spending them on unworthy things, you yourself deprive some effective part of yourself of the opportunity for realization. Honestly admitting a shortcoming and looking for a profitable and useful trend to replace it with is a better way. It is to replace, and not just to eradicate, since the empty space will require filling and it is better to choose in advance what you want to achieve or what to develop in yourself, before another takes the place of one shortcoming.

What are the shortcomings of a person?

Just as all human nature has a physical and mental side of manifestation, so also the shortcomings are divided in relation to these areas. Mental disabilities include any deviations from the mental norm confirmed by a medical-psychological commission (including intellectual-mnestic and speech disorders, deviations in the emotional and mental sphere, developmental delays). Physical disabilities include any deviations from normal criteria for physical development that limit physical, mental and social activity and are confirmed by a specially created medical commission.

These two types of deficiencies have normative criteria and are objectively recognized, but when it comes to talking about human shortcomings, most people will not remember mental and physical ones, referring them rather to the sphere of clinical diseases, while defining some personal manifestations as shortcomings. It is the characterological characteristics and patterns of interaction that are considered those shortcomings that need to be fought and which a person is to some extent able to overcome on his own.

Criticism of one's own behavior most often includes spinelessness and the inability to refuse. What prevents you from living your life, and in some cases contributes to the special exposure of your needs, while being quite convenient for those around you. The reasons lie in the desire to please everyone, and deliverance entails a certain restructuring of life. You will have to understand that not all your friends like you; many simply take advantage of your reliability; you will have to accept your own aggression and strength, and learn to handle them, and not push them into the darkest corner, as before. The inability to defend your interests and refuse people speaks of problems with intrapersonal boundaries and the ability to defend them - see if you are in a codependent relationship and how much of your own life you have left.

The next trait that does not add advantages to your interaction with society is arrogance, and it has been noted that it is shown extremely rarely to strangers in real life, but in relation to a close circle of people or on the Internet, statements with an arrogant look and in a humiliating form are increasingly appearing. others. This is driven by an illusory sense of security (it’s harder to get an unflattering answer from a loved one than from a stranger) and problems with. The world is full of people, better and worse than you, but neither the first nor the second manifestation is your concern, everyone is free to do as they please. You can call for humility endlessly, but think about why it is so important for you to remain at the imaginary peak, criticize and strive to establish your own rules, is there really nothing else to do in your own life other than increase your importance in such ways?

Somewhere nearby the need to control may arise, and it’s good if it turns out to be the surrounding space, and you nag your household for placing jars in the wrong order in the kitchen, and if this begins to concern the lives, actions and choices of others, then be prepared for the fact that those around you They will soon howl and run away. Again, talking about violating boundaries and invading someone else's life. Taking responsibility only for yourself and giving advice only when asked - this is approximately the state of affairs you should strive for.

Many attribute the shortcomings to groundless, bordering on and not allowing either partner to live in peace. This is not considered a manifestation of passion or fear of losing; at the level of sensations, this is perceived as distrust or even an insult in that such thoughts are allowed. Soon, excessive jealousy brings with it another drawback, which can exist separately -. Not counting white lies, which is also a dubious undertaking, the reputation of a liar did no one any good, and ruined quite a few relationships.

There are many negative features; only those complaints about which are more common were considered, but in any case, when identifying shortcomings, one should focus on one’s own system of values ​​and feelings (among killers, killing is a craft that has been honed over the years and is respected, but it is unlikely to become a big deal dignity for a teacher in a children's group).

The shortcomings of a loved one

When starting a relationship with someone, we usually fall into the belief that the person is ideal, but over time, the efforts to present only our positive qualities decrease and the real picture opens up and the curtain of raging hormones falls and it turns out that there is not such a prince nearby. Those who are lucky even like the shortcomings in their loved one and can find similarities in these moments, but then these qualities cannot be considered direct shortcomings in the partner’s system of perception of the world; rather, it is about an imposed social image. But when some manifestations of your partner begin to infuriate you, and you try to eradicate them, it means that you are faced with something that is a flaw in your life model.

It is worth noting that the adjustment of the behavioral and emotional manifestations of the other begins on both sides, consciously or not, since differences in characters without appropriate changes will lead to the impossibility of peaceful existence on the same territory. Everyone decides (or rather feels) what to consider as shortcomings independently, but on the basis of habitual attitudes and family scenarios in parental families. But there are qualities and signals that require analyzing the possible consequences.

This includes being consistently late without regard for the value of your opinions, time, or plans. Rudeness, manifested towards others, relatives, and you personally. Perhaps it is a verbal form of violence, shouting or the use of force - a person’s inability to restrain his own impulsiveness and aggression is a critical shortcoming for building relationships. Excessive jealousy can please self-esteem at the beginning, but then turns into a manifestation of possessiveness and restriction of your freedom.

Any flaw, before revealing itself fully and causing irreversible damage to your life or psyche, manifests itself in minor moments; there is nothing that indicates the possibility of manifestation or worsening of the situation. So, in order not to participate in rehabilitation activities, think about it at the beginning and be attentive to details.

The formation of a person’s character and behavior occurs through the prism of his inherent advantages and disadvantages. There are negative and positive qualities in each of us; life would not be so interesting if we did not strive for the best, if we did not try to become more perfect.

But the attitude towards your negative traits is another question, which can have three different scenarios:

  • I am this way from birth, this is my personality. If someone doesn't like my shortcomings, don't communicate with me.
  • I am bad! I can't keep my emotions to myself. And that’s why I won’t see relationships, promotions at work, decent wages, etc.
  • I am aware of my shortcomings and will try to do my best to get rid of them or reduce their manifestation.

A person who lives according to the third principle, constantly working on himself, has every opportunity to transform disadvantages into advantages.

Human dignity

Following the principles of public education, a person should not focus on his merits. It is considered more correct to apply them in practice, in the form of noble deeds.

A well-mannered person has hundreds of virtues.

In search of ways for development and improvement, a person should not go to extremes. You need to try to remain an individual - to achieve public recognition without blending in with the crowd.

A person who constantly works on himself has the following advantages:

  • The ability to be compassionate. Showing concern for your neighbor in both sorrow and joy, supporting and helping any living creature is not just a virtue. This is either a gift or painstaking work on yourself.
  • Development alone is impossible. To develop communication skills, you need the skill of communicating with familiar and unfamiliar people. This will help you develop not only, but also socially.
  • Nobility and selfless help are a manifestation of the highest morality.
  • The most important human qualities are devotion and fidelity.
  • Reading between the lines is the ability to grasp details. This quality will allow you not to drown in the information flow.
  • To prevent mistakes in the process of improvement, it is necessary to have foresight and insight.

By improving these moral and volitional qualities, a person complements his individual positive character traits.

In addition, they are excellent helpers in controlling negative emotions that push them to actions that are not typical for a well-mannered person.

Personality flaws

A person has a unique set of qualities, each of which can be classified as both advantages and disadvantages. Let's look at the example of responsiveness and generosity.

Public opinion positions these qualities as positive, but looking from a different perspective, we begin to perceive them as negative.

If someone needs help, a sympathetic person will definitely provide support. And this is considered a virtue. But with excessive responsiveness, it is difficult for a person to live; he cannot resist the “exploiters” around him and refuse requests. From this perspective, responsiveness is already a flaw for its owner.

There is no arguing about generosity either; it is undoubtedly one of the virtues. But in the case of immeasurable generosity, when a person begins to distribute gifts in all directions, to the detriment of himself and his loved ones, this already becomes a negative quality and is called wastefulness.

Disadvantages are personal characteristics that negatively affect, first of all, the life of the person who possesses them.

Any human passion can become a vulnerable spot, for example:

  • destructive emotions - rage, sudden mood swings, hot temper;
  • depravity - greed, gluttony, envy, etc.

You can conditionally divide all the shortcomings into groups:

  • Psychological: restlessness, rigidity, deceit, cynicism, excessive sociability or, on the contrary, isolation, lack of self-control, the need for constant evaluation of actions, underestimated or overestimated, etc. These shortcomings can drive their owner into the deepest depression, creating problems at work and in personal life.
  • Physical: problematic skin, crooked teeth, weight, height, etc. These physical flaws are purely subjective, each of them can be turned into some kind of highlight. If you don’t work on them, then they can provoke complexes and non-acceptance of your inner world. And in the future, deep personal problems, unfulfillment and misunderstandings with other people may arise.
  • Women's: shopaholism, callousness, resentment, swagger or excessive modesty, duplicity, greed, excessive narcissism or denial of one’s feminine principle, lack of emotion. Such flaws lead to the development of diseases and destroy personal life. Lack of emotional self-control disrupts feminine energy, which begins to repel men.
  • Men's: rudeness, stinginess, sloppiness, lack of determination, dictatorial and patriarchal views on life, etc. Such shortcomings do not allow men to calmly build a career and personal life.

How to get rid of shortcomings

You can improve your life and give meaning to your existence through personal growth and self-improvement. By getting rid of a quality that interferes with your life, you make your life path easier and more joyful.

Step-by-step plan for getting rid of shortcomings:

  1. Recognize your shortcomings. Often, a person knows what exactly prevents him from living in peace. To improve your characteristics, start by analyzing the irritating qualities in the people around you. They are the ones that bother you because you cannot accept them within yourself.
  2. Having discovered a shortcoming, there is no need to remain inactive and complain about life, taking the position of a victim. Some people take pleasure in their “suffering”, but at the same time become incapable of responsibility and control of their lives.
  3. Realize your shortcomings. You need to understand and accept it. Also, you should not strive to correct the shortcomings of your loved ones, but try to accept the person along with his shortcomings. If you can’t accept it and he continues to bother you, start with yourself, not with your loved ones.
  4. Control and tracking your thoughts. It will be difficult at first, but anyone can learn it. Then gradually all shortcomings will become conscious and under your control.
  5. Flaw analysis. Understand his character, how he interferes, what he can lead to. Draw a mental picture of what will happen to you if the flaw remains with you forever and how this could end. This will be a motivation to quickly get rid of your negative quality.
  6. Replacing disadvantage with advantage. By destroying the irritant, you will free up space that needs to be filled with something. If you don’t fill this place with something correct and positive in time, you risk acquiring new shortcomings and bad habits or the return of old shortcomings with new strength.
  7. Forget about excuses. Both yourself and your shortcomings.
  8. Find the source of its origin, understand where this deficiency came from. The bulk of complexes and qualities originate from childhood. By observing his parents, the child absorbs their behavior, which establishes and programs his further development.
  9. We multiply the positive quality acquired after getting rid of the negative.

Advantages and disadvantages of a resume

When filling out an employer’s application form, you may come across a point where you are required to indicate your shortcomings. This is just a test of the candidate's adequate self-esteem, and not an attempt to identify all your imperfections.

If such a point appears in the questionnaire, do not be alarmed and do not skip this column. Everyone has shortcomings.

When choosing qualities for your resume, take into account the specifics of the position you want to get, correlating them with your personal capabilities and abilities. Basically, the applicant must have the following strengths:

  • discipline;
  • responsibility;
  • determination;
  • attentiveness;
  • responsibility;
  • communication skills;
  • work for results;
  • resistance to stress;
  • ability to learn, etc.

Stop at a couple (no more!) of your strengths, write a description about each. One sentence is enough, but in detail and with specifics.

Here are examples of strong characteristics for a resume:

  • I work for results - I don’t leave unfinished business, I’m able to make timely decisions, and I’m quite active in communication.
  • Sociable - has experience working as a sales manager, as well as an interviewer.

Analyze your qualities, choose the most worthy of those that may be required for a future position. Once you have decided, describe it interestingly and in detail. This will interest the employer faster than a list of banal, meaningless words.

What shortcomings can be included in a resume?

The list of negative qualities should be thought through in advance. In everyday life they may be disadvantages, but for the desired position they will be advantages.

For example, a person’s ability to see flaws in everything is considered a flaw, but at the same time it is necessary for those who work as auditors or test programs.

Examples of resume weaknesses that may turn out to be strengths:

  • Excessive need for communication;
  • Workaholism and inability not to think about work;
  • Pickiness and corrosiveness;
  • Formalism;
  • Slowness;
  • Reliability;
  • Meticulousness to detail;
  • Lack of flexibility, unable to make compromises in work;
  • I do not hold back in expressing my own opinion, straightforwardness;
  • Over-energy, restlessness;
  • Excessive display of emotions, hot temper.

Let's highlight neutral disadvantages suitable for all professions:

  • Numerous phobias (confined spaces, insects, fear of heights or flying, etc.);
  • Dependence is weakness on something (sweets, animals, etc.);
  • Susceptibility to excessive analysis of one’s steps and miscalculations.

What disadvantages scare employers away?

You should not indulge in frankness when listing your shortcomings. Some of your weaknesses can create an unpleasant impression and intimidate employers.

These qualities include:

  • Periodic delays and tardiness;
  • Laziness;
  • Lack of independence, inability to make decisions;
  • Inattention, frequent breaks, spending time on social networks;
  • Purely monetary interest;
  • Commitment to office romances;
  • Complete lack of responsibility.

Each of us has shortcomings. You just need to understand and accept them, constantly work on yourself and improve yourself. In this case, small shortcomings can be compensated by large advantages.

Although it is believed that man was created by God, in His image and likeness, he is a sinful and imperfect being. However, its shortcomings are also undeniable. And these shortcomings include such unsightly qualities as pride, greed, envy, condemnation, intolerance, stubbornness, and so on, the list can go on for a long time. Many of these qualities, unfortunately, are ingrained in a person from childhood, that is, they are the result of improper upbringing of a child in the family by parents.

A person’s strengths and weaknesses do not appear in him suddenly and suddenly, this is understandable. Everyone has a hand in shaping the distinctive character traits of a child, starting from the parents themselves and their immediate environment, and continuing with kindergarten, school, and so on. For example, if in childhood a child was constantly pushed, forced to rush, when he was forced to run to a large number of circles and sections, try to do everything in time, otherwise he would be scolded - he develops such a quality as impatience. Stubbornness also appears when parents always try to go against the will of the child and cause in him a constant feeling of protest, and permissiveness, on the contrary, leads to promiscuity and arrogance.

The shortcomings, like the advantages of a person, of course, have deep roots. Greed can form in a child from a lack of love and attention, and this can also lead to despair and despondency, which will then lead to self-abasement. Then a boss will appear who will suppress his will, so fear, hypocrisy, and servility will arise in the person, which will in no way lead him to self-respect and self-esteem.

What are human dignity, how are they expressed in life and character? Actually, according to Dahl’s dictionary, dignity is respect, a set of fairly high moral qualities. And it should not be confused with arrogance, these are completely different things. When they say that this one means that he is worthy of respect, thanks to his valuable personal qualities, behavior in society, actions, and so on. If a person begins to inflate his price, he becomes arrogant, thus losing respect for the honor and dignity of the individual. Therefore, you need to understand that these are completely different things.

A person’s advantages and disadvantages continue to be formed even when he leaves childhood, under the influence of society. A positive assessment of his behavior and actions elevates him in the eyes of the public. This can give him strength and desire to fight his shortcomings and strive for further improvement. A negative assessment by public opinion can lead to aggravation of these shortcomings, therefore, ideally, this assessment should be objective.

Recognition by society of a person’s dignity means a certain assessment regarding his moral qualities. The more strongly such qualities as honesty, respect for people, nobility, goodwill, sincerity, modesty, sensitivity, and so on are manifested in him, the greater the value such a person represents for society. Accordingly, if parents want to raise their child as a worthy member of this very society, they must lay down and develop in him these

These also include:

Modesty. This is when a person, even having many advantages, behaves simply and unnoticed, without sticking them out or boasting.

Shame and conscience. Believers say that it is the voice of God inside a person that tells him what is good and what is bad and leads him to the desire to repent of his bad actions.

Honor. These are also worthy of respect from society.

One who has this will never insolently insult anyone, humiliate or insult another.

This is the advantage of communicating with a person who has honor and dignity.

It's no secret that in our modern world, almost nothing is ideal. Each individual has his own characteristics. For some these are advantages, but for others these are significant disadvantages. It all depends on how the person himself relates to this or that character trait.

Even if we take any quality of a person, it can be attributed to both advantages and disadvantages. If we take for example such a trait as generosity. If for friends, then this is a positive quality; everyone likes generous friends, but if you look from the other side, as for the family, then this is already a person who is somewhat wasteful, then this is considered a disadvantage.

Another example is responsiveness. A sympathetic person will always come to the aid of his neighbor. This is of course a positive feature. But if a person is overly responsive or, more simply put, trouble-free, then he will also have a hard time in life. People around you will use it. Therefore, everything good should also be in moderation.

Following from this, shortcomings should be understood as personal qualities that prevent you from becoming successful and happy.

Types into which the main shortcomings of a person can be divided

  • Psychological type - such shortcomings often scare people away and create problems in their personal lives, and can also become an obstacle to career growth. (anxiety, withdrawal, laziness, fear, cruelty)
  • Physical type - such defects are somewhat subjective, because any physical quality of a person can be perceived from different angles. These include height, body structure, eye color, face shape, body type, skin condition. Some people don’t like being overweight, but for others, being overweight is something to be proud of, the same can be said about short and tall stature. Some people have a complex about their short stature, but for others it is an advantage.
  • Female type of shortcomings - these include excessive modesty or promiscuity, talkativeness, duplicity, greed, callousness, touchiness and others. Such shortcomings sometimes even lead the weaker half to discord in their personal lives.
  • Male type of shortcomings - these include dictatorship, rudeness, lack of a sense of humor, greed, untidiness, indecisiveness, and others. These shortcomings can also make life difficult for men.
    No matter what shortcomings or advantages a person has, it is important to know that we ourselves are the creators of our own character.

Hello, dear readers! Ideal people do not exist and this is no secret. Such a person can only appear in our imagination. This helps you strive for better, grow and develop yourself. But the ideal image also has a downside - the search for minuses in a person, deviations from ideality. Today I will answer the question - what are the shortcomings of a person? Where do they come from and what to do with them.

What are disadvantages?

By Ozhegov a flaw is a flaw or irregularity in something. All people have flaws. And if you and I start compiling a list, it will not be possible to finish it. After all, for each person everything is very subjective and individual.

The problem with imperfections is that they are not objective. I agree, a group of people may consider too cheeky behavior a disadvantage, but there will definitely be a person to whom this will seem like a highlight and peculiarity of a person, he will not see anything bad in this quality.

Only you decide which qualities in a person are worthy of being called his minuses and which are his advantages. Only you decide which quality in yourself can be considered a minus and which a plus. The main thing is to have adequate self-esteem and not put yourself on a pedestal or push yourself under the plinth.

You can find a lot of useful information about self-esteem in the article “”.

The only thing we can say for sure is that imperfections can manifest themselves on a physical and psychological level. Let's take a closer look at each.

Physical

Here we talk to you about everything related to appearance. For many short women, it is a huge disadvantage when men are too tall. But for tall young ladies, on the contrary, this will be an advantage.

For most, snoring is a terrible thing. For example, I cannot sleep if someone snores loudly next to me. And my friend calmly tolerates such noise. Her husband snores horribly loudly and so does her dog. Now she can’t even sleep without this snoring.

Too many moles, a crooked nose, bulging eyes, crooked legs, a girl’s small breasts, big ears, and so on. This list can be continued indefinitely. Any flaw in appearance can be equated to a human defect.

But there are people who know how to present their external imperfections as the most outstanding advantages. For example, Marilyn Monroe, who elevated a mole on her face to wild popularity. Many young ladies still deliberately draw a spot on their face, but this was considered a drawback.

Many external disadvantages can be corrected without even resorting to surgery. For young ladies, of course, it’s much easier to do this. The cosmetics industry today is at such a high level that you can make a princess out of any frog.

Men have a more difficult time here. But they can also outshine their imperfections with an excellent sense of humor and charisma. One of my friends is very fat. But when you meet him, you don’t notice the completeness. He is so charming that everything else fades and disappears from view.

Psychological

If everything is extremely simple with physical disabilities, then what can be called psychological defects of a person?

Lack of a sense of humor, arrogance, tediousness? This is where there is definitely no room for objectivity. For each person, certain qualities of other people are disadvantages.

One of my friends couldn’t stand sociable people, she always tried to keep a great distance from the interlocutor, she hated being touched during a conversation and considered her sociability to be a terrible flaw. On the contrary, I consider this a huge advantage.

In the behavioral aspect, it is impossible to draw a clear line between disadvantage and advantage. After all, for some people a bore seems to be an unbearable interlocutor from whom they want to run away as quickly as possible, while others find in him an interesting interlocutor who knows how to carry on a conversation on any topic.

Some people cannot stand lies, while others call it resourcefulness and resourcefulness. Different views on the same quality. Only you can tell whether this will be a disadvantage or advantage of the person or yourself.

A man finds what he is looking for

One of my clients constantly complains about people: about colleagues, about children at her son’s school and their parents, about her husband and his family, about her own girlfriends. She sees the same problems and imperfections in everyone, constantly discusses them and cannot establish normal communication.

The problem is that a woman is fixated on those qualities that she cannot afford. The friend is too frank in her communication, the colleagues have a million hobbies, the husband relaxes with friends on weekends.

An acquaintance has been friends with a young man for a long time. All her friends consider him an ideal prince: he does not smoke or drink, he is gallant and courteous, with a wonderful sense of humor, wealthy, hard-working, and so on. But she doesn’t want to connect her fate with him. And when asked why, he answers: its only drawback is that it has no shortcomings.

Do you understand the absurdity of the situation? Imperfection can be found even where it would seem that it cannot exist. We ourselves look for cons in people.

Look for virtues. Notice the benefits, focus on the positive qualities.

If you don’t know how to start seeing the good in people, then I recommend that you read the article “”. After all, what kind of people surround us depends only on our views. Start with yourself.

What would you say are the main shortcomings of any person? Do you know about your pros and cons? How do you work on your imperfections?

Look for only the good in everything!